Idiot Savant Seeks Eclectic Dirtbike Staff
by Staff
Well, MOFOs, it's time for Ashley to add to her two-wheeled collection -- 11 bicycles (give or take a few) and three motorcycles just isn't enough. Indeed, every righteous biker knows that the proper number of bikes to own is (N+1), with (N) being the amount of bikes you currently own...

The decision for which you'all will proffer advice has thankfully been narrowed down: Fire-breathing 2001 Honda CR500 two-stroke or electric-start 2003 Yamaha TTR225 four-stroke. Dirtbikes, yes, but highly disparate ones, hence the dilemma.

The CR500 has many endearing qualities: Reportedly, it can reach escape velocity quite quickly. Thus, exiting from bad blind dates or snoozer meetings is that much quicker. It's not very Puritan, mind you -- downright slutty, in fact, because everyone and their brother will want to ride it -- but it's pretty loyal: the CR will definitely try and kill anyone attempting to mount or tame it. Ah, if only guys were so loyal...

Then there's the relatively staid TTR225. If Dykes rode dirtbykes, this would be their first choice: Plush, smooth and kinda plump, it's like the fat guy that's always there for you, willing to go the extra miles (the TTR's gotta get at least twice the mileage of a CR500), but, sadly, although we know it's the smart choice, girls love the bad boys. And so the CR500 looks to be the winner.

What say you, MOFOs? Reports from previous owners? For added consideration: JohnnyB has a TTR and it'd be cool to beat up on him even-Steven and then listen to the (very eloquent, of course) excuses roll forth. Conversely, Dirty had a CR500 and the joy derived from not letting his envious, instant-adrenaline-gratification-self riding it would be priceless... Decisions, decisions!

The forgotten update: Ashley has five motorcycles. And is in Idaho now, where the CR500 can be registered as street legal, thereby bypassing annoying California laws banning off-road two-strokes: Street-legal bikes are legal everywhere... Hmmm... how many gas stashes does it take to get a pig of a two-stroke from Idaho to California, off-road the whole way?

Get in your Inbox Staff Staff presents an unrivaled combination of bike reviews and news written by industry experts

More by Staff

Join the conversation