We sometimes say that the motorcycling public is a large and diverse set of people, and while that may be true, Youtuber “Yammie Noob” has broken us down into nine simple categories (with some colorful language you may not want your youngsters to hear). Do you swear by the Ninja 250 and its ability to make you a better rider? You’re in here. Do you spread the ATGATT gospel everywhere you turn? You’re in here, too. Hipster with a broken cafe racer? Oh, you’re definitely in here. If you’re reading this and don’t ride a cruiser, chances are you fall into one of these categories. I know I do. Heck, there’s a good chance that even if you are a cruiser rider you can relate to a few of these. So, which one are you? Let us know in the comments section.

  • 12er

    That was great and I think Im about 5 of those…

  • Prakasit

    Dianese .. ha ha. Wonder what wearing AStar and riding zx6r says about me.

  • TheMarvelous1310 .

    Most of the riders I know are cruiser riders, and some combination of the Euro guy and the Comfortable guy. Oddly all of the squiddies I know ride dirtbikes, in huge groups, and run from the cops like it’s normal.

  • Born to Ride

    Ugh, I’m the euro guy and the comfort guy. I wish I had the disposable income to be the track day guy…

    Although it irks me that he had a picture of a Ducati Paul Smart in the non-running hipster bike category. Those machines have the wonderful DS1000 motor that runs forever. Provided you adjust the valves regularly…

  • Antwan

    I have a ducati and a dainese jacket 🙁

    • Born to Ride

      Me too…

  • spiff

    This hurts a little. How can so many characteristics not be awsome. I wear Dainese. (Yes very nice, but admitted brand whore.) I pull at least 10 wheelies during my 5 mile commute (It’s a supermoto, some aren’t on purpose), and an array of other not awsome things he talks about. Screw you guy’s, I’m goin home.

    • spiff

      Ah f#@k, my bike is European, and I have a pony tail. What if I am the guy that makes a mess of a messy list.

      • Mahatma

        Did you check all categories on that list?

        • spiff

          Thankfully no. I don’t have the time for track days. 🙁 Oh, and I am not high vis, or comfy guy. Well, I’m kind of comfy guy. Damn it.

      • TroySiahaan

        Own it, Spiff! Loud and proud. 🙂

  • Ian Parkes

    It had pictures of bikes that weren’t sports bikes. So, yeah. And that has nothing to do with the fact he nailed me.

  • That guy’s hilarious! Hire him.

    • …but don’t fire me.

      • TroySiahaan

        Um, Gabe? Yeah, we need to talk…

        • Dave Edwards took me out for a drink before he took me behind the woodshed. I ordered the most expensive scotch they had, but it was a dive bar and they only had Black Label.

          My life is sad.

  • sgray44444

    The closest I come is Mr. “so much more comfortable”. Doesn’t mean that I won’t ever own a supersport… ok, yeah it probably does. I’m on a Speed Triple or Vstrom, don’t do high vis or atgatt, not into trendy.

  • JMDonald

    This dynamic works for more than just sport bike riders. Definitely some of the funniest stuff out there. We all create an identity for ourselves whether we want to admit it or not. I’m not like that, am I? Maybe I am. There must be someone who has documented the several stages of this type of realization. Or maybe rationalization. Something in your heart wants to know. Doesn’t it?

  • John B.

    Unfortunately, I’m closest to the character described as Uncle Hi Viz (Ugh) sans the pronounced midsection, jeans, and ATGATT pronouncements, BUT once my kids get out of college and grad school, and I pay for a wedding or two, I will either become “Mr. Euro Snob” or “Mr. 250 is Always Enough” depending on my chip count. A middle-ground would be to get a BMW R nine T, some white T-shirts, grow a beard, and pretend to be “The Classic” except MY ride will NOT “always be NOT working.” Too funny Troy. Thanks for sharing.

  • Matt Forero

    I fell through the cracks. My Bonneville is neither cafe’d out nor ever broken. Maybe Comfortable guy?

  • Old MOron

    Hey, they forgot the guy who carries articles written by John Burns in his tail bag to show everyone at the burger barn and to prove how good his bike is. That’s me!

  • JWaller

    I guess I’m comfy, high-viz, Euro-trash. Euro-trash because I don’t wear Dainese and my bikes are two Triumphs and a Ural…. Nothing Italian. Maybe once the kids grow up and get through college I can get a Ducati and Dainese gear, though the Italian brad i’d prefer is Moto Guzzi.

  • Shlomi

    Well, I’m riding street triple is that really makes me the comfortable guy? Even if i put the Daytona rearsets….

  • Kevin Duke

    Wait, that bastard stole of pic of me wheelying the Super Duke!

    • Old MOron

      Hmm, I missed that the first time, seven seconds into the vid. At least they timed it perfectly the word “hooligan”.

  • Steve Cole

    So uhm… what if you own two italian bikes, three race bikes, a couple of dirt bikes and…. a Burgman? Where do you get shuttled then?! So confusing…

    • TroySiahaan

      I don’t know where you slot in on this list, but you can slot in as my riding buddy! You need someone to help you ride all those things, right? Especially the race bikes… and the Burgman.

      • Steve Cole

        LOL … everyone loves the Burgman.

  • Gruf Rude

    I’m the slow, well-past medicare, classic guy with a cafe’d ’69 CB750, a BMW R100RS, a Ducati 800SS and an adventure touring KLR650. Biggest difference is that all my old iron still run and every one of them have carried me on week-long camping tours in the last few years.

  • Alclab

    A funny video this guy did! So many of us identify with one or the other at some point… I know I was Mr. 250 is enough and did put some 600’s to shame on the really tight twisties… Yet since riding a 750, I no longer think like that :p

  • Matt C

    I think they forgot the all too cliche Harley rider.. Dressed head to toe in HD gear… Buys a bike then immediately strips it for chrome Screaming Eagle everything. Trailers his bike everywhere, just so he can take it for a ride around the block somewhere, then put it back on the trailer and take it home… .Will defend HD’s honor to the death despite the many flaws, recalls, and issues HD owners experience.

    • Rightwheel

      Title of the article: “The Nine Sportbike Riders You Will Meet”.
      Looking forward to “The Nine Cruiser Riders You Will Meet”, though. Trailer Queen will be in there.

  • Michael Maness

    Guess I’m in the ATGATT crowd, But it was not always that way, I’ve got the scars that show it.
    Soon to be 55, I learned a lot over the past 40 years of riding. Still I get tired of people asking me “Aren’t you hot in all the leather?” or “Isn’t it to cold to ride?” I just want to say to some of em, No I’m not hot, cus I roll up the windows & turn on the AC. or the heat….. ok rant over…

  • Tinwoods

    I’m a little of a lot of these types.

  • DaveMarsha Timmerman

    Atgatt and comfy ona Vstrom 1000! Great video!