1. The older I get, the faster I was. There are old bikers and there are bold bikers, but there are no old, bold bikers.

The Many Injuries Of Evel Knievel

Another combination of two complementary idioms. To be old and wise, one must first transition from being inexperienced and foolish. Even Evel Knievel, after breaking 433 bones, learned this lesson. Being young and moving fast is easy, knowing when to let others pass is a much harder lesson to learn.

Honorable Mentions
• Does this bike make my butt look fast?
• Asphalt, the world’s fastest tattoo remover.
• Three quarters of my wages were spent on motorcycles, beer and women, the rest I squandered
• There’s two kinds of riders: Those who have crashed and those who will.
• Keep your bike in good repair: Motorcycle boots are not comfortable for walking.
• Ride, eat, sleep… repeat.
• Remember when sex was safe and motorcycles were dangerous?
• I don’t feel like going for a ride today, said no motorcyclist ever.
• Ass, gas or grass, no one rides for free.

  • David Kent

    “Keep the shiny side up!”

  • Baggerchris

    Keep the Rubber side down!

    • David Kent

      Same/same, but yours works better for the new crop of “customs”. They don’t have a shiny side!

    • Jeremy Ball

      I like when the sticky side in on the bottom.

  • Andy Tuttle

    Anyone know where the photo in #10 was taken? I’d like to go there. -Andy

    • dustysquito .

      That’s from ADVRider.com. I think that one is still on their front page rotation. They should have a photographer’s credit if you look at it on ADV rider.

  • Manny Pandya

    A nice montage, but I’d put your #10 at my #1, and then say it in Italian like Rossi… so sexy (the saying, not Rossi).

  • Kevin Boggs

    I respectfully disagree with No. 8 and yes, I’ve had several cases of serious road rash. Don’t tell me how to ride my motorcycle and I won’t tell you how to ride yours. If safety is your primary concern then get a Volvo. I prefer to find a happy medium. Thanks.

  • Kevin Wynn

    They missed a gem “Blahblahblah….There was nothing I could do, I had to lay’er down.” The single dumbest thing any rider could ever say.

  • clasqm

    If you want to know the shortest, most efficient way to get from A to B, never ask a biker.

  • evansg

    it is what it is.

  • len alan

    I made a “T” shirt with “If you don’t ride a motorcycle, you wouldn’t understand ” on the back, so my wife would be reminded every time I took the bike for a ride.

  • rudedog4

    ATGATT. People always ask me if my Roadcrafter suit is hot, to which I reply, “I’d rather sweat than bleed.”

  • Jay Stevens

    #9. “The objective is to fill the pot of experience without emptying the pot of luck.”


  • Vernus Buss

    The person who wrote this should learn how to spell, and how to edit. Don’t be telling anyone to learn how to ride instead of loud pipes. They do save lives. Idiot! TRUTHINESS is not a word. Dumbass.

  • Vernus Buss

    Always decline a ride request if the person asking to ride your motorcycle doesn’t own a bike of equal or greater value and performance. Really….lol. Most bikers will only let a bro take it for a ride. As if a biker is going to let anyone take their pride and joy for a ride, and like we need to be told this sage advice…lol.