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Old 09-18-2002, 04:09 PM   #1
BykerGeek
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Default Is the Ladies Man on staff now?

"Notice the lack of wang hugification."

ROFLMAO!
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Old 09-18-2002, 08:17 PM   #2
Gabe
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Default SV Owners Collectively Awarded Sanctimonious Prick Award

Las Vegas (Reuters) In a quiet ceremony at the Sands Casino today, representatives of the collective body of SV650 motorcycle owners were awarded the 2002 Sanctimonious Prick award by the National Academy of Sanctimonious Pricks.



"As a large body of smug, self-rightous a$$holes, SV owners have succeded in annoying and irritating the larger community of motorcyclists by constantly chirping on about how great their bikes are, even when the topic of conversation has nothing to do with middleweight twin-cylinder motorcycles, or anything to do at all with motorcycles." said noted media critic George F. Will, master of ceremonies for the 3-hour long NASP awards ceremony. "By doing so, they preserve and carry on a grand tradition of sanctimonious pricks everywhere."



Seattle SV owner Alen Heng accepted the award on behalf of owners of the mildly acclaimed budget motorcycle. "I appreciate the honor bestowed on us by the Academy, and we will strive to be evermore sanctimonious, smug, and annoying."



Last year's, recipient, rock star Bono, wished the new awardees well in a press conference from his world headquarters in Nairobi. "Although their acheivments pale next to mine, I suppose the constant mentioning of their vehicle's postitive attributes will bring a high standard to the feild of sanctimonious prickery. Did you know I'm going to solve hunger as well as AIDS?"
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Old 09-18-2002, 09:27 PM   #3
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Default ;)

we aim to please, its not our fault we own such amazing, well made, impossibly fun motorcycles. all at a low price that with just a few simp....... ect ect ect.



ya, i know some of us sv owners rant about our bikes, but hey, so does everyone else.
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Old 09-18-2002, 10:52 PM   #4
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Default Re: SV Owners Collectively Awarded Sanctimonious Prick Award

Gabe! ROFL!



How's your SV keeping up these days?
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Old 09-19-2002, 04:45 AM   #5
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Default Re: SV Owners Collectively Awarded Sanctimonious Prick Award

In other news, a spokesman for Arrogant Riders on Sport bikes (ARS) announced that the group after much discussion and a nationwide member vote has decided to accept the offer to join the Condecending Ar$eholes of America Group (CAAG).



In a statement released earlier, the President of ARS, Squid Lee said. "We still stand by our club charter; "If it doesn't 160 mph, then it 'ain't a motorbike." but when it came down to it, ARS and CAAG had one overriding belief that bound our groups." When pressed about the common tie he continued. "Both our groups believe that God gave us noses so that we could look down them."



A new name for this association is still pending although there is strong speculation that it may eventually become known as "The Republican party."
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Old 09-19-2002, 05:03 AM   #6
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Default Re: SV Owners Collectively Awarded Sanctimonious Prick Award

Sanctimonious Prick Award Generates Controversy



Red "Knucklehead" McCoombs responded in a belch-punctuated 3 A.M. phone call to the SV Owners most recent award, which comes fast on the heels of their having been awarded the dreaded "Chicks think it's CUTE!" award last June. A partial transcript follows.



"I ain't sure what y'all are braggin' on - I mean, you could put that whole motor into one of mah Hog's cylinders. An' their ain't nowhere to put tassels or conchos or leather saddlebags on that SV thing... or a sissy bar. My hog's got real loud exhaust - and it's made in the YOU-ESS-AY! An' it's got better resale value, an' loud pipes, an' it shakes real hard at idle, an' Sonny Barger has one, an' loud pipes save lives. Plus, it's manly as *****. And loud. I park mine on a lace doily in the foyer off of the dining room, next to the Sharper Image solar-powered humidor/wine cellar/atomic clock combination I got from the firm for my 20th anniversary. The chrome compliments my collection of authentic Tribal Carvings. Did I mention how loud it is?
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Old 09-19-2002, 05:59 AM   #7
akcarlson
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Default Working for MO must be nice.

So, lemme get this straight. On a day-to-day basis, you're graced with the presence of Mr. John Burns (and undoubtedly get to spit shine his boots), you get to go to all sorts of track days and ride all sorts of great bikes, too. But, forget about that. You get all manner of performance upgrades for your own bike, probably for free, and get to take them all with a clear conscience under the pretense of 'journalism.'



Jealous? You bet I am.
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Old 09-19-2002, 06:02 AM   #8
akcarlson
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Default In fact...

I propose a new survey:



Is Elliot a lucky, spoiled bastard?



Yes [ ]

No [ ]

Who's Elliot? [ ]
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Old 09-19-2002, 07:09 AM   #9
micro
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Default Re: SV Owners Collectively Awarded Sanctimonious Prick Award

Before I bought a sv i was warned by (ARS) members that I would be getting blown away by real sportbikes. But after a year of riding all the time. I realized that hardcore sportbikes see little use! The riders usually out on the road are harleys; and standered style motorcycles!
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Old 09-19-2002, 07:33 AM   #10
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Default Re: Working for MO must be nice.

You forgot about the babes and beer.
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